Our 'lil Superstars…!

Had a disturbed night, the last one…my sonny had a 'lil fever and was restless too. Even as I lay there staring at the slow moving ceiling fan, visuals of a 12 year old boy hanging from the ceiling kept flashing in my mind. No, I hadn't seen 12 year old Sushant Patil of Sharadashram school, neither was I at the scene to report. But the image was still there…vividly clear. Blame it on the media if you wish, these images of a kid hanging, bullets, violence, murder et al are all around us each moment.


It's so easy for someone to point a finger at a current blockbuster and blame two main incidents of recent times as an aftermath influence from the movie! Most newspapers I'm going through in Mumbai have the story on the front page. It is more important and thought provoking 'coz Sushant is not the only case. 18 year old Bhajan Preetkaur an engineering student and believe it or not a 11 year old Neha Sawant in the suburb of Dombivili followed the same path. While securing more marks was the cause for the 18 year old, for 11 year old Neha, her parents not letting her participate in a dance show was reason enough.


My son's an year and two months old and I dread the societal times he is growing up in. There is so much competition all around. At work, in the society, at home among siblings and in the school or college. Professors (like in the popular movie I was refering to) badgering-in all the time that no one remembers who took the ‘second place’ in the race. Parents continuously upping the pressure to perform – CAN THE ‘LIL ONES TAKE IT?


Gone are the days when a 80 percentile on the report card was an excellent performance. A 90 today is scorned upon – Toppers meet the 97 – 98 even a 99 point something percentile and it’s this rat race to perform across diverse strata and environments that are leading to increased heart burns and quicker burnouts. Whether be it a young executive at the helm of his corporate career or be it our growing generation.


With working parents; kids today end up living their lives on their own, learning on their own and taking decisions too as they please. The modernistic society loves to term it “independence”. We take pride in our kids being able to do their things on their own and not depending on us as much. But being given the toys and gadgets that adults still strive to cope with, these ‘lil minds hardly possess the discerning ability to choose the right from the wrong – recognize the ‘peak’ of their desires from the ‘want’ that the society thrusts upon them.


I was very particular in starting a family soon after marriage and living with our parents, simply ‘coz of the value system it’ll help build in my growing son. My dad told me one day when I returned from work “I almost re-live all the time I lost with you; in the time I spend with my grandson”. It almost got me thinking – What a rat race of an existence we live. We make all the money, live all our dreams and buy all the property in the world to ensure we enjoy a certain respect/status in the society we live - our kids have an immaculate source of ancestral wealth he can depend upon - and our generations thrive. But what use if we’ve already lost our kids early in the ‘morals’ they’ve built for themselves?


My son gets restless around 6 pm each evening. He leads us to my parent’s bedroom and picks up the ‘lighter’ kept at a designated spot and points it at the lamp near the ‘praying area’. This toddler joins his hand in prayer and shows us the same.
I did not teach him this. But my mother (his grandmother) follows this routine with him every evening. I am busy at work everyday and so is my wife. But we have a backend – my parents – whose lives revolve around their grand child. They have all the time in the world to narrate stories to him – to sing songs for him and I was surprised the other day when I saw my otherwise strict and ‘straight-faced’ dad doing a few dance steps with him (I saved that moment on video!).


And this is the comfort that I hold in my mind when I’m at work – that my kid’s growing-up in safe hands. Living with parent’s maybe an irritant at times. There are times when we feel we lack the freedom or are frustrated at being curfewed-in. But there is also the joy in learning the tricks of the trade.


I probably got the maximum attention as a single child with both parents in the educational field (mom and me almost left for school and got back at the same time). I look back at the comfort that it has provided. When parents insisted on at least one meal together as a family – praying together – At least one vacation together (where there were no phone calls allowed). It creates a bond – a feeling of being wanted – a security that cannot be substituted. And most of all a TRUST deep within that when all hell breaks loose – when the world says you are a failure – you still have a ‘home’ to go back to where you still are the SUPER STAR! And that’s what we need to give our ‘lil Superstars”!